1/4 of the way there! And NIAW

I hit 10 weeks on Thursday.  Which makes me 1/4 of the way there!  And still 2 more weeks until my N/T scan.  Still the occasional bout of nausea, but that’s pretty much it.  I feel fat, and pregnant.  I like that second one….

And today marks the last day of National Infertility Awareness Week.  I haven’t really said or posted anything about it, and at this point I feel like it’s too late. 😦  Last year I’m sure I said something on FB, but this year I hesitated because, well, I’m pregnant.  Not that I don’t appreciate the week.  IF sucks.  But I mean, I certainly wasn’t going to “come out” on FB during NIAW.  I just don’t know what to say. 😦

Really?

Ok, I lied.  I’m making time to post again today, because I officially hate this cyst.

Can I say: OW?

When I mentioned it offhandedly this morning, it was because I had a little achey owwie on the right side (where Dr. Lady told me the cyst was).  No big deal.  I also thought it could just be O pains.

Well, now I’m in a fair amount of pain.  800mg ibuprofen and a heating pad, don’t seem to have done much.  I have one lonely vicodin left from my IVF, and I’m debating taking that before bed.

Oh, yeah.  And I’m pretty sure I’m about to O.  So we should be having sex.  But even walking is painful, so…. I think that’s kind of out of the question.

This cycle’s just a big fat bust.  The cyst kept us from doing another IUI, and now it’s even ruined need-to-have-sexy-time.  *sigh*

OTOH, reading more about cysts and whatever, my understanding is that the most likely cause was an egg that didn’t successfully leave the follicle, so it fills with fluid and stuff.  While I know there’s no point in over-analyzing and trying to figure out why the last IUI didn’t work, at least I can feel a little better about the fact that (most likely) one potential egg probably failed, so that lowered our chances.  Eh, trying to look on the bright side I guess.

*sigh*

Happy TTC Anniversary.

Not one I’d like to celebrate…

Two years ago today, we officially started TTC.

Andrew said he wanted it to be special, so I got all romantic, I bought roses (which of course go drastically up in price exactly one week before Valentine’s Day), I lit candles, I even sprinkled the bed with Hershey’s kisses (in lieu of rose petals, which I think are kind of lame), and a cute little heart shaped pillow.  And we happily embarked on our TTC journey, full of hopes and dreams.

I joined a popular message board, certain that everyone would hate me when I got KU that very first cycle!  Bahahaha, how naive I was.

On the plus side, I’ve made a number of awesome friends on those message boards.  The hard part is that the majority of them already have their adorable babies (a few are even pregnant with number two), but I still really value their friendship.  I don’t think I’d have held on to even the shred of sanity I have left if it weren’t for them. 🙂

Two years, two miscarriages, two uterus-exploring surgeries, one uterus-repairing surgery, 3 failed IUIs, one failed IVF… I’m ready.

Come on, universe.  Let it be my turn.

Damn you Aetna

So, two weeks ago, when I got my smiley face (indicating I was about to ovulate) I Emailed Michelle to get the ball rolling on this cycle.  Little did I know just how involved a process it is to get Aetna to pay for the fertility meds.

I wanted to blame Michelle for not starting sooner, but Dr. Lady said in our appointment today that it’s not her fault, and that Aetna is just really, really difficult.

I know I’m incredibly lucky to have any infertility insurance coverage at all, but Andrew just said: why give me the coverage if you’re going to make it next to impossible to use it?

So here it is, CD1.  The start of this cycle.  I’m supposed to start my meds tomorrow.  TOMORROW.  And I spent an hour on the phone with Aetna (granted most of that was on hold), and people at my clinic have spent probably comparable amounts of time on the phone (and hold) today.

On the way home from our appointment, Stephanie called me to say the meds finally got approved, and a pharmacy in California would call me soon to get everything set up.  So they called, and I gave them all my information, and they called Aetna………. only to be denied for the fertility meds.

W
T
F

I am seething right now.  It’s 4:30 on a Friday before a holiday weekend.  And I’m feeling pretty convinced I’m not going to get my meds.

Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster that I have some Follistim left over from my IVF cycle.  Otherwise I’d be screwed.

I asked Dr. Lady how people deal with this, especially if you’re doing back to back cycles.  She said a lot of times people just pay for the meds out of pocket.  Which I’m sure is what Aetna wants.  Well, they can suck it, because if they tell me they’re going to pay for something, you bet your sweet ass they’re damn well going to pay for it.

Stay tuned!

I don’t like change

So, when we first signed up with my RE, she had a wonderful Medical Assistant… let’s call her Angela. (None of these are real names)  Great bedside manner, great at her job.  In our last meeting with Dr. Lady, she even admitted that Angela was too good for only being an MA, and had been “promoted” to the Donor Egg program.  Sad to see her go, but good for her!

When I started IVF, we got an IVF coordinator… we’ll call her Heather.  About as good at her job as Angela, but maybe a little less bedside manner.  Which was fine, it’s not like she was lacking in it, just a little less soft.

Right before I started the drugs, apparently Heather went to work with another doctor at the practice exclusively–whether at her request, Dr. Lady’s request, or the other doctor’s request, I don’t know.  But I was stuck with Stephanie.  Who had as great a bedside manner, but was lacking a little in the proficiency that Heather had.  It was fine, a few eye-rolls between me and Andrew, (like when she didn’t know where I was in my cycle) and not too big a deal.

But now that I’m back to IVF, I’m working with the new MA.  Michelle.  I can’t exactly put my finger on it, but she’s not even as good at her job as Stephanie… and far away from being an Angela.

So I’ve been through 4 people there.  And I’d like to think I’d be more ok with it if they were all of the same caliber.

I think I’m going to ask if I can work with Stephanie instead, if she doesn’t only handle IVF patients.  Because I have a lot more confidence in even her ability to get things done than Michelle’s.

In other news, I’m down about 4 pounds since the beginning of the year! 🙂

Wait, what? IUI?

So we met with Dr. Lady today.  And I was pretty surprised that she recommended we try IUI + injectibles (basically the same as IVF meds, but a lower dose).  Instead of another IVF.  I asked about doing that after our first 3 Femara IUIs failed, but she said she thought IVF was our best chance, and with injectible IUI there’s a high risk of multiples, and she would cry if she gave us triplets.  Yes, she actually said she would cry (and I believe her).

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